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What pisses me off? Hypocrites, man! Folks judgin’ escorts but secretly dialin’ ‘em up – HA! Two-faced clowns, all of ‘em. Makes me wanna scream, “This is my punishment?!” like Monty’s dad. But nah, I just laugh – why so serious, right? Funniest thing? Some escorts got code words – “roses” for cash, “dates” for gigs. Cracked me up when I heard that, so clever, so twisted!

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I rush over to her place on Lichfield Road. When I get there, the whole family’s gathered. And there’s Mabel, waving her arms like a madwoman. I’m trying not to laugh, but it’s hard. The cat’s just chilling on a branch, looking down like, “What’s the fuss?” I grab a ladder, and after a bit of a struggle, I finally get the cat down. Everyone’s cheering like I just won a medal or something. I’m like, “It’s just a cat, people!”

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