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So, check this—sex-dating’s been around forever. Like, Victorian dudes had “calling cards” for sneaky booty calls. Wild, huh? Bet they didn’t expect dick pics in 2025! I’m laughin’ so hard I’m cryin’—guys sendin’ blurry junk shots, thinkin’ it’s sexy. Bro, chill! I saw one profile—dude wrote, “DTF, no fatties.” Made me ragey—wanted to slap him through the screen. Who raised you, wolves?

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After a while, I headed back down. I was feeling all philosophical, thinking about life and stuff. But then, I tripped on a rock. Classic me, right? I fell flat on my face. I was so embarrassed! A couple of hikers helped me up, and I just laughed it off. “Just testing the ground, folks!”

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