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So, picture this—some lass, yeah, workin’ the streets, got more grit than half the suits in Slough. I reckon she’s got stories that’d make yer eyes pop. Like, did ya know, back in Victorian times, whores used to nick wallets with their toes? Toes, mate! Mental, right? Multitaskin’ before it was cool—eat yer heart out, Excel spreadsheets! Makes me chuffed, thinkin’ bout that hustle. Proper blue-sky thinkin’, no HR bollocks.

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I hit up the local café on Blackburn Road. You know the one, with the dodgy Wi-Fi? Yeah, that place. I order a coffee, and the barista, bless her, spills it all over the counter. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed.” But she laughs it off, and I can’t help but chuckle too. It’s like, we’re all in this together, right?

New sports track proposed as council seeks opinions on 5 key town centre sites