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What gets me hyped? The tech of it—those pressure points? Mapped tighter than a Starlink constellation. Happy as hell when they hit that spot—ya know, the one that’s like, “I am a free man!”—boom, Chiwetel Ejiofor vibes from the flick. But man, I got pissed once—dude was half-assin’ it, like a Boring Company intern on day one. I’m like, bro, commit or GTFO, this ain’t a Tesla recall. Surprised me how some spots—uh, lower quadrant—can zap ya awake faster than a triple espresso. Meme alert: “When she says ‘just a massage’ but now you’re broke and callin’ her ‘senpai.’”

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Anyway, I finally find what I need. It’s this ancient scroll about the history of the Docks. Super cool, right? But then, I drop it. Yup, I dropped a piece of history. I’m freaking out, thinking I’m gonna get kicked out of the archives for life. But the archivist, bless her, just laughs and says, “Don’t worry, love. It’s tougher than it looks.” Phew!

Fixing Gloucestershire’s ‘crumbling roads and broken services’ top aims of newly elected Shire Hall Lib Dems