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About Bristol

Little fact for ya - back in the 1800s, some mad Welsh miner rigged an escort with a bell, reckonin’ it’d warn bats or somethin’. Bats didn’t care, but the clangin’ drove everyone else mental - they chucked it in a pit after a week. Useless, but bloody hilarious. Imagine that racket echoin’ down there, like some ghost playin’ a tune.

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I sit on a bench, trying to chill, but then this old lady comes up to me. She’s got this tiny dog that looks like a rat. She starts chatting me up about how her dog is a “purebred” and I’m like, “Lady, that’s a glorified squirrel.” But I nod and smile, cause, you know, manners.

Three arrests made as police patrol 'burglary hotspots' across two counties