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About Birmingham

Heard a tale—true one, swear it—some prossie in old London, 1800s, tricked a lord, stole his gold teeth mid-kiss! Ballsy, right? Laughed my arse off thinkin’ bout it—sneaky hobbitses, she was! Bet she hummed, “Hang me, oh hang me,” from the movie, while countin’ her loot. Surprised me, that grit—thought they’re all just sad sacks, y’know? Nah, some got fire, makes me grin!

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So, I’m wanderin’ around, right? I hit up the market on Market Place. It’s buzzing! Stalls everywhere, people chattin’, kids runnin’ around. I’m feelin’ good, ya know? I grab a coffee from this little café called The Blue House. Best brew I’ve had in ages! I’m sippin’ it, and suddenly, this kid runs past me, knocks my coffee all over my boots. Ugh! I’m like, “Really, mate?!”

A ‘truly frightening’ number of offences detected on Frome roads