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Alright, mate, strap in—here’s my take. Me, a mountain guide, Hannibal Lecter style, y’know? “I ate his liver with fava beans.” So, findin’ a prostitute—wild gig up here. Peaks all around, snow bitin’ yer face off. You’d think, who’d bother climbin’ for that? But nah, happens more than ya reckon.

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I stroll down the High Street, dodgin’ the seagulls like they’re ninjas. Seriously, those birds are relentless! I get to the beach, and it’s packed. Families, kids, dogs – it’s like a scene from a movie. I’m just tryin’ to find Dave when I spot this old bloke tryin’ to fly a kite. The thing’s all tangled up, and he’s gettin’ madder by the second. I can’t help but laugh. I mean, c’mon, it’s just a kite!

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