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Great Scott! Sex-dating’s a wild ride, huh? I’m sittin here, thinkin bout it—like Zero Dark Thirty, it’s all about the hunt! You got yer apps, yer swipes, it’s a freakin mission, man! “We’re all in this together,” like them CIA folks say, but nah, it’s every perv for himself out there! I mean, who’s got time for flowers when yer tryna smash by midnight?

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But then, I hear this commotion. A bunch of kids are running around, and one of ‘em trips and falls right in front of me. I rush over, and I’m like, “You good, mate?” He’s fine, just a bit shaken. But then his mates start laughing, and I can’t help but chuckle too. Kids, man. They’re hilarious.

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