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Once, this bloke on Grindr—fit as a fiddle—sends me a dick pic afore “hello.” I’m like, “Thou brazen knave!” Laughed my arse off, tho. Sex-dating’s a circus—clowns, acrobats, all wantin’ a quick tumble. I’m picky, see, want a spark, not just a poke. “Look at me, one day left,” Monty groans—aye, I feel that! Wastin’ time on duds pisses me off fierce.

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As I sit there, I think about Fort-William. The beauty, the chaos, the rats. It’s a mad place, but it’s home. I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Well, maybe a lifetime supply of scones. But that’s a different story!

Scotland’s Breathtaking Highlands Fort William Transforms with Thriving Tourism, Historic Charm, and Exciting New Businesses After Past Criticism