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Lemme paint ya a picture. Back in Moscow, this underground scene—sex-dating’s been a thing since Soviet days, hush-hush. Prolly still is! You’d think it’s all vodka and caviar, but nah, it’s sweaty palms and coded messages. Little known fact: back in ‘80s, comrades used newspaper ads— “lonely mathematician seeks fun”—wink, wink. Now it’s apps, but same game, y’all. Same damn game.

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Then, I decide to take a stroll down Finchley Central. The vibe is nice, people are out and about, and I’m trying to shake off the morning’s drama. I pass by the Finchley Memorial Hospital, and I can’t help but think about how many people have been through there. It’s a bit heavy, ya know? But then I see this kid on a scooter zooming past, and I can’t help but laugh. Kids are so carefree.

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