Hazel Failsworth Whore ❤️

About Glasgow

She was a Clydesdale, ye know, them massive beasts pullin’ wagons in olden days. Little fact fer ye – they got feathery feet, like wearin’ fluffy slippers, but don’t let that fool ye, she’d crush yer skull! Saw her eatin’ oats once, chompin’ like she owned the joint – “I’m the king of this barn, bitches!” I says to meself. Made me happy, that sass, ‘cos I’m a sucker fer a critter with attitude. Like Zuckerberg in the movie, y’know? “I invented Facebook, I’m the shit!” Whore didn’t invent nothin’, but she ruled that paddock, my precious!

Which county is Failsworth in?

I'd rather live in Failsworth than Moston for example. There are nice suburb-areas in Failsworth, decidedly middle-class areas, but you're never far away from rougher areas. The industrial .

Then, boom! The reaction goes off like fireworks. I’m jumping around, shouting, “I did it! I did it!” My colleagues are looking at me like I’ve lost it. But hey, I’m a biochemist, not a boring accountant!

Failsworth pub welcomes new landlords with 'bonkers plans'