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They got skills tho, escorts. Not just bangin’, nah—psychology, charm, the whole "adapt and overcome" bit. Like Scarlett’s alien chick, “What are you?”—they read ya, figure ya out quick. Little known fact: back in Victorian days, high-class escorts were called “courtesans”—fancy, huh? Had power, ran shit behind closed doors. Surprised me, honestly—thought it was all grim alleys and desperation. Nope, some were queens in their game!

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First off, the weather was all over the place. One minute it’s sunny, next it’s pouring like the heavens opened up. Classic Ewell, am I right? I’m behind the bar, and this group of lads comes in, soaked to the bone. They’re laughin’ and shoutin’, “Get us pints, mate!” So, I pour ‘em a round of lagers. They’re chattin’ about the football match last night. Apparently, Ewell’s own team, Ewell FC, got smashed. Poor blokes. I mean, who doesn’t love a good kickabout, but c’mon, 5-0? Ouch.

Why Epsom and Ewell has become Surrey’s best place to retire according to local experts