Rebecca Erith Erotic Massage ❤️

About Birmingham

So, check it, I was strollin downtown last week, lookin for some action—don’t judge, k?—and it’s like, whoa, these girls got stories, man! One chick, she’s all “I’ve borne my burden!” like in *Dogville*, and I’m thinkin, damn, she’s deep! Prostitution’s been around forever—fun fact, ancient Rome had brothels called “lupanars,” wild, right? Made me happy knowin I’m part of history or somethin. But then, this dude tries rippin me off—20 bucks extra? Nah, bro, that pissed me off! I’m like, “You ain’t Tom Edison screwin me over!”—straight outta *Dogville*, ya see?

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I walk in, and it’s packed. I’m standin’ there, waitin’ in line, and this barista, bless her heart, is takin’ forever. I’m like, “C’mon, I’ve got trees to hug!” Finally, I get my coffee, and it’s like liquid gold. I take a sip, and it’s heavenly. But then, BAM! I spill it all over my shirt. Great. Just great. Now I look like I’ve been attacked by a caffeinated monster.

Man taken to hospital after being found injured on busy Erith road