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About Bristol

Oi mate, blimey, here we go—erotic-massage, eh? What a bloomin’ corker of a topic! Me, Boris, your ol’ pal, ramblin’ on like a toff at a tea party. Now, I reckon erotic-massage is a bit like marmite—ya love it or ya don’t, no in-between, capisce? Been ponderin’ this, sprawled out in me Downing Street bunker, thinkin’—cor, what’s the fuss about? Hands slidin’ about, oils, candles—sounds like a ruddy Roman orgy, *delectatio maxima*!

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s Mrs. O’Reilly from the other side of town. Her dog, Buster, ate a whole pack of chocolate biscuits. I’m like, “Great, just what I need.” So, I hop in my car, zoom down the Belmore Street, and let me tell ya, the traffic was a nightmare. I thought I’d never get there. Enniskillen’s roads can be a real pain sometimes, ya know?

£10K of drugs uncovered in Enniskillen searches