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Okay, so, like, escort’s not just a car—it’s a mood. Back in the 70s, peeps were losing it over this thang. Little factoid for ya: the Ford Escort was, like, Europe’s top seller—beat out all those snooty cars! I’m shook. Imagine me, Kimmy, in 1975, rocking platforms, posing by my Escort—iconic. I’d be all, “This car’s my soulmate, literally.”

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So, I hop in my trusty combine, ready to tackle some fields just outside the city. But first, I gotta navigate through the streets. I’m cruisin’ down South Street, and I swear, every car in Elgin decided to be on the road at the same time. Like, c’mon, people! It’s not rush hour! I’m sittin’ there, honkin’ my horn, and I’m like, “What’s the hold up? A parade or somethin’?”

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