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In games, tho, it’s a riot—*Dirt Rally*, *Gran Turismo*, slingin’ it sideways, feelin’ godly. Quirky thing—old Escorts had dodgy electrics, wipers goin’ rogue mid-race. Laughed my arse off first time that happened—screamin’, “Fix this, you mortal junkheap!” Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares—I’d still nick one from some Asgard garage, just to mess with Heimdall.

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So I’m strollin’ down the High Street, and I’m thinkin’ “This place is kinda cute.” Little shops everywhere, folks chattin’, kids runnin’ around. But then, BAM! I see this massive line outside the bakery. I mean, c’mon! It’s just bread! But nah, it’s Edwinstowe, and they’ve got the best pastries. I’m like, “Forget this!” I’m not waitin’ in line like a sheep.

Check out this Edwinstowe gem with a Tudor look but modern features such as bar in garden and TV mirror in bathroom