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About London

Angry, it makes me—fake profiles, catfishers, ugh! Wasted time, ya know? Once, this lad—thought he’s a 10—turns up, bald, belly like Jabba. “Lies, I hate,” says I, stormin’ off. But happy, too—met a lass once, violin lover she was. Chatted all night—sex-dating win, that was! Strings we played, heh, in more ways than one.

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First off, I’m walking down Bridge Road, right? Just minding my own biz, when I spot this old lady. She’s got a shopping cart full of, like, random stuff. I’m talking about a rubber chicken, a half-eaten sandwich, and a garden gnome. I’m like, “What’s the story here?” But she just gives me this look, like I’m the weird one. Classic East Molesey, right?

Wellbeing walks and cycle rides: don’t stay alone this festive season