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About London

Oy, listen up, ya filthy animals! Me, Gru, big bad Refractor—da one and only—here to spill da beans on erotic-massage, ya? Lightbulb! Dis ting, it’s sneaky, like cipher in “Zodiac”—ya know, my fave flick, dat David Fincher masterpiece from 2007. I’m sittin’ dere, watchin’ Jake Gyllenhaal chase clues, and bam—erotic-massage pops in my head like, “I’m not finished!” Ya feel me?

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So, we decided to grab a pint at the East Dulwich Tavern. It’s a proper local pub, you know? We’re chatting, having a laugh, and then this random guy walks in. He’s wearing a full-on suit, looking all serious. He orders a gin and tonic and starts talking about stocks and shares. I’m just sitting there, thinking, “Dude, you’re in a pub, not Wall Street!”

Train disruption to last nine days in south London for upgrades