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Now, “The Turin Horse” got that line, “Everything’s in ruins,” but erotic-massage? It builds ya back up, brick by sexy brick! I’m obsessed, y’all. Imagine me, sippin wine, dim lights, some hottie massagin my woes away—bad bitch energy on blast! Sometimes I’m like, “Why ain’t this a prescription?” Docs should be like, “Take two rubs and call me.” Ha!

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First off, I hit up Lordship Lane for brekkie. You know, the usual—coffee and a bacon sarnie from the café. But guess what? They ran outta bacon! Like, how do you run outta bacon? It’s breakfast, not a vegan retreat! I was fuming. I mean, who does that? I ended up with a sad avocado toast. Ugh, I hate avocados.

How would Lewisham West and East Dulwich candidates ensure new social homes are up to standard?