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So, check this—back in the 1800s, “escort” meant armed guards for fancy carriages. Wild, right? Now it’s all “companionship” and side-eyes. Makes me cackle—imagine tellin’ some Victorian snob, “Yo, your bodyguard’s my date tonight!” Bet that’d ruffle their corsets. I dig the hustle, tho—takes guts. Kinda like Monsieur Oscar in “Holy Motors,” slippin’ into lives, no script, just raw chaos. “What makes me run?” he says—prob same as escorts: cash, thrill, whatever!

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But then, I’m walking back, and I see this guy on the corner of The Green, shouting about something. Turns out, he’s selling “magic” crystals. I mean, come on! Magic? Really? I’m all for good vibes, but this dude was way over the top. He’s waving his arms like he’s conducting an orchestra. I couldn’t help but laugh.

Non-league team score four in added time for ‘greatest comeback in football history’