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I’d design a game bout it, too. Call it *Rub-a-Dub Royale*. You’d level up by makin’ clients happy—knead here, oil there! Maybe add a mini-game where you dodge creeps tryna ruin the vibe. “I’m not a miracle worker!”—that’s what I’d say, like Etheline in the movie when stuff gets nuts. Oh, and fun fact—didja know in Japan they got this thing called “nurumassage”? Slippery as heck, all gel and giggles! Blew my mind when I found that out.

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After that, I head back to my workshop, feeling a bit better. I’m back to carving, and this time, the wood’s cooperating. I’m getting into the groove, and it feels good. But then, I hear this loud crash outside. I rush out, and there’s a delivery truck that’s backed into a lamppost on Station Road. I can’t even!

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