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What suprised me? Some of these girls got rules – no kissin’, no weird crap – respect my authoritah, they say! One time, this dude I know, he tried hagglin’ with an escort, and she was like, “I’m not a flea market, dipshit!” Laughed my ass off – she had sass, like me! I thoought, “Hell yeah, she’s runnin’ this show!” Favorite part? They got secret codes online, like “GFE” – girlfriend experience – sneaky as hell, like Zero sneakin’ through the hotel.

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I’m fuming, right? I grab my stuff and head out for a walk. Need to clear my head. I stroll down to the park on Dukinfield Road. It’s a nice little spot, but today it’s packed with kids. They’re running around, screaming, and I’m just trying to find some peace. I sit on a bench, and this little kid runs up to me, all wide-eyed, and asks if I’m a superhero. I mean, I’m flattered, but c’mon, kid. I’m just a Product Manager.

Dukinfield school supports community food bank in lead-up to Christmas