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me, I’d never bother—too busy watchin’ waves, shoutin’ at idiots swimmin’ pissed. but escorts? they’re out there, dodgin’ coppers, fakin’ orgasms, livin’ a double life like some bleedin’ superhero. “Memory is a motherfucker,” Polley’d say, and ain’t that the truth—punter remembers a goddess, escort remembers a sweaty arse. *snorts* brilliant, messy, mental—sex escorts, mate, a right laugh if you ain’t the one payin’!

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Then, I bump into my mate, Sarah, at the park. She’s all about that fitness life, running like a gazelle. I’m just trying to keep up, but I’m more like a sloth. We chat about life, work, and how Droitwich is just the best. I mean, it’s got history, right? Roman salt mines and all that jazz. But then, she mentions moving to London. My heart sinks. I’m like, “No way, you can’t leave Droitwich!” But she’s got dreams, and who am I to hold her back?

Welcome news as banking hub set for Droitwich after branch closures