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About Bristol

I reckon it’s peng, fam – gets ya relaxed, then bam, ya horny too! Like, “Is it ‘cos I is black?” that I notice how them masseuses be sly with it? Sneaky fingers, bruv, slippin where ya least expect. I was chillin once, got this lass rubbin me down, and I’m thinkin, “Shit, this ain’t no Tesco back rub!” Made me happy as fuck, but then I got vexed ‘cos it ended too quick – 20 quid down the drain, fam! Shoulda lasted longer, like them three-hour vibes in *Blue*.

The blossom tree

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Now, here’s where the day takes a turn. I’m walking back home, feeling all proud of my purchase, when I trip over a crack in the pavement. Classic Dinnington, right? I go flying, and my bag spills everywhere. My bacon butty, my new sweater, my dignity—all over the pavement. I’m lying there, and I can’t help but laugh.

Smirking face of drug dealer now behind bars