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So, this whøre, right? Ugly as hell, spiky fins, looks like it’s judgin’ me. Reminds me of Uncle in *Yi Yi*, quiet but deep, y’know? “Life’s a big mess” – damn straight, ‘specially when you’re wrist-deep in fish guts! Little known fact, these suckers got teeth – TEETH, bro! Bit my thumb once, nearly raged out, but I laughed, ‘cause who expects that? Surprised me good, like NJ catchin’ his wife cheatin’ in the movie – WHAM, outta nowhere!

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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, right? The sun’s peeking through my window on Cardiff Road. I’m like, “Sweet, let’s grab some brekkie.” I hit up this cute café on the corner of The Green. You know the one? The one with the weirdly named pastries? I ordered a “Dinas Delight” or whatever. It was just a scone, but hey, I’m not judging.

Council accused of hypocrisy for taking action against changes to garden