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So, find a prostitue—where you even start? Streets? Online? Back in the day, Victorian London had 80,000 workin girls—crazy, huh? Now it’s all apps, DMs, shady X posts. You gotta be sharp, mate—cosmic brain on! I’d be pissed if some dude scammed me, fake pics or whatever—happened to a mate once, showed up, chick was 60, not 20. Fuming! “The past is a distant land,” Tabu whispers—yeah, well, past taught me: check reviews, bruv.

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So, I decide to escape the chaos and head to the Denmead Community Centre. They’ve got this art exhibit going on. I’m thinking, “Cool, some culture!” But when I get there, it’s just a bunch of weird paintings. Like, one looks like a potato with legs. I’m standing there, trying to figure out if it’s art or just a bad joke. I mean, who even thinks, “Yeah, let’s paint a potato”?

Plans for new nursery building at Denmead Junior School