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Downside? Dodgy parlors—sketchy vibes, cash only, nope. Stick to legit spots, or it’s “This is a DISASTER!”—Remy’s panic mode. Done proper, tho? You’re golden—muscles loose, brain’s like, “We’ve peaked, lads.” Pro tip: warm oil, firm grip, no half-assin’—it’s not a Boring Company tunnel, dig deep! Exaggeratin’? Maybe—but a killer sexual-massage could launch me to Mars, no cap. Thoughts? Eh, brain’s pingin’—next topic, fam!

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So, I’m sippin’ my coffee, and I see this old bloke, right? He’s just standing there, staring at a pigeon like it owes him money. I chuckled. Like, mate, it’s just a bird! But then, boom! The pigeon takes off, and this guy jumps back like he’s seen a ghost. I nearly spat my coffee everywhere. Classic Darwen moment.

Around 100 jobs affected as sinks manufacturer set to leave East Lancs