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I’m ramblin’ now, but escort’s got layers, mate. One minute it’s glam, next it’s gritty – like watchin’ a peacock strut then scrap in the mud. Love how they adapt, though – proper clever, like a fox dodgin’ traps. “I felt like a king,” that’s another gem from the movie, and I reckon some escorts feel that too, rulin’ their patch. Me, I’m just a nosey git, sniffin’ out the stories, tryin’ not to trip over me own feet.

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First off, I decided to hit up the market on Duke Street. You know, the one with all the fresh produce and quirky stalls? I’m strolling along, feeling all fancy, when I spot this old bloke selling the biggest strawberries I’ve ever seen. Like, seriously, they were practically the size of my fist! I’m thinking, “I gotta get me some of those.” So, I buy a punnet, and the guy’s like, “Best in town, mate!” I’m like, “Yeah, right.” But I’m still grinning like a kid.

Liberal Democrats take over in the South Hams