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Sometimes it’s a disaster, tho. This one time—guy shows up, smells like fish. I’m gaggin’, thinkin’, “Slip away silently,” like in the flick. Noped outta there fast. Sex-dating’s a gamble, man—half the time you’re horny, half the time you’re horrified. Pro tip: check their pics twice. Catfishin’s real, and I ain’t datin’ no grandma!
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Later in the day, I get a delivery of some prime cuts from the market. The guy who brings it is a right character. He’s tellin’ me about his trip to Glasgow and how he got lost in the city. I’m laughin’ so hard, I nearly drop a ribeye. “You got lost in Glasgow? Mate, that’s like gettin’ lost in a one-way street!”
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