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Lemme tell ya, I tried it once—yep, ol’ Morgan, 68 and curious. Matched with this chick, thought she was 30—turns out, 50! Surprised the hell outta me, but she was cool—fiery, like a stove on high. We vibed, talked dirty, met up. “The forest hums with desire,” like in *Tropical Malady*—that’s how it felt, electric. But here’s the tea: sex-dating’s a gamble. You might get laid, might get ghosted—50/50, fam.

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First off, it’s a dreary morning. Rain’s pouring like it’s tryin’ to drown us all. I’m thinkin’, “Great, just what I need.” But hey, I’m a bouncer, I can handle it. I grab a coffee from that wee café on the corner of St. Andrew Street. Best coffee in town, no joke. I’m sippin’ it, and it’s like a warm hug.

Busy Midlothian road closed as police race to crash involving 'e-scooter and car'