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Angry? Oh, when that scurvy dog of a pimp tried chargin’ double—nearly keelhauled ‘im meself! Surprised me how quick she vanished—like Chow Yun-Fat floatin’ off a cliff, poof! Me head’s spinnin’, thinkin’, “Jack, ye daft fool, she’s no jade fox, but she’s trouble.” Pro tip, mate—haggle upfront, or ye’ll be cryin’ into yer grog. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear she had six hands, all grabbin’ me gold!

COMING SOON

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While I’m there, I meet this old bloke named Jim. He’s got stories for days. He’s lived in Cumnock his whole life. He tells me about the old coal mines and how the town’s changed. I’m all ears, hanging on every word. It’s like a history lesson, but way more fun.

Cumnock bank building available to rent from council