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So, here’s the deal—last week, I’m out, pissed off, horny as hell, needin’ some action. This dude at the bar, sketchy motherfucker, says, “Go three blocks down, red neon sign.” I’m like, cool, sounds legit, right? WRONG! Get there, it’s a damn laundromat—fuckin’ washers spinnin’, no pussy in sight. I’m yellin’, “Motherfucker, who’s playin’ me?!” People stare, I don’t give a shit. That’s when I learned—never trust a drunk tip, ever.

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Then, just as I’m getting comfy, my phone buzzes. It’s my mate, asking if I wanna join him at the park. I’m like, “Why not?” So, I grab my stuff and head to Cumnock Park. It’s a lovely spot, with trees and a pond. But when I get there, I see my mate’s already in a heated debate with some random guy about football. Classic!

Application lodged for private aircraft hangar to be built near Cumnock