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Alright, you bastards, listen up! I’m Eric Cartman, respect my authoritah! Sexual-massage, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s freakin’ sweet! Like, imagine some hot chick rubbin’ ya down, all sensual-like—gets me goin’ just thinkin’ about it! I saw this movie, *The Tree of Life*, freakin’ masterpiece, and it’s all about life’s big crap—birth, death, and horny vibes in between. “The only way to be happy is to love,” they say in it—damn right, ‘specially with a sexual-massage!
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So, I finally make it to my meeting at the Crieff Hydro. Fancy place, right? I’m all disheveled, and my boss is there, looking sharp as ever. I sit down, and he’s like, “You look like you’ve been through a war.” Thanks, mate. Just what I needed to hear. But then we start talking about this new project, and I’m getting pumped. We’re gonna work with some local artists, and I’m all in. Crieff’s got talent, man!
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