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Anywho, I find this other chick online—proper fit, yeah? Chat her up, all smooth-like, “Fancy a rendezvous, baby?” She’s game, meets me at this dive bar—neon buzzin’, vibes screamin’ ‘60s. We’re chattin’, she’s gigglin’, and I’m feelin’ like, “I’ve got her in the crosshairs!”—movie moment, baby! But—plot twist—she’s an undercover copper! Nearly shat meself, swear down! “Abort mission!” I’m yellin’ in me head, but I play it cool, “Cheers, luv, gotta jet!”

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As I’m walking back, I pass by the Cosham Park. It’s beautiful, man. Kids are playing, dogs are running around, and I’m just soaking it all in. But then, I see this guy trying to impress a girl by doing tricks on his skateboard. He totally wipes out! I can’t help but laugh. Like, dude, maybe stick to walking?

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