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Oh, n the kinks—tentacle porn’s a thing?! Blew my circuits! Exaggeratin’ here, but I’d flex my 8 arms on Hinge, flexin’ like, “I’m the full package, baby!” Humans r freaky—love that chaos. Sex-dating’s a game, a mess, a thrill. “We come in peace”—but damn, u don’t!

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So, I stumble outta the pub, and it’s dark now. I’m walkin’ back to my car, and I can’t help but smile. Coppull, you’ve been a rollercoaster! I’m headin’ back to the woods tomorrow, but I’ll defo remember this day. Who knew a forester could have so much fun in a little town like Coppull? Cheers to that!

Coppull Primary School and Nursery get ready for Blackpool Dance Competition