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Oh, and the quirks—ever notice the weird music? Flutes and shit, like I’m in a forest? Annoys me, but then—bam—those hands start workin’, and I’m sold. Exaggeratin’ here, but feels like they’re squeezin’ my whole damn life out! “What’s discarded becomes treasure”—Varda’s line fits perfect. Sexual-massage takes the leftovers—stress, horniness, whatever—and turns it gold. Greed is good, man, and I’m greedy for this every damn time! You try it yet? Tell me, bud—worth the hype?

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So, I’m an ichthyologist, right? Fish nerd, basically. I was all set to check out the local ponds. You know, do some fishy stuff. But first, I had to grab a coffee from that little café on Collier Row Road. The one with the weird name—“The Fishy Brew.” I mean, c’mon, who names a café that? But their lattes? To die for.

Arrest made after man seen with firearm near Romford Wetherspoons pub