Luna Coleraine Sexual Massage ❤️

About Leicester

Oi, you lot, listen up! Me, a swineherd? Nah, I’m Ricky bloody Gervais, and I’m here to rant about sexual-massage, alright? Sexual-massage – what a posh wank that sounds like! Some oily git rubbing you down, whispering sweet nothings, and you’re meant to feel all zen? Bollocks! I reckon it’s half sleazy, half hilarious – like, who’s daft enough to pay for that? Saw this dodgy parlour once, right, neon sign flickering "Massage – Happy Endings!" – made me cackle so hard I nearly choked on me pint. Proper grim, that was.

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So, I’m sippin’ my tea at the wee café on the corner of the Diamond. The barista, bless her, she’s all smiles. I’m like, “Can I get a strong one, love?” She laughs, says, “You need it, mate!” I mean, who doesn’t need a strong cuppa in Coleraine?

Ex-Coleraine manager is unlucky to lose his job... but he has overcome far bigger challenges in his life