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So, picture this—dim lights, weird music, some gal whisperin’ sexy junk. “You’re a soldier,” she says, like in “Carlos”—total turn-on! Hands slidin’ like fish in a tank—surprised me how good it felt! Mmm… donuts. Thought in my head: “This beats fishin’!” Exaggeratin’ here, but felt like a freakin’ king—better than beer! Little story—heard some dude in Japan invented a “happy end” version—sneaky bastard! Hilarious, but genius.

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First off, I’m heading down the High Street, and I’m already late. Classic me. I’m dodging folks, trying not to spill my coffee. You know how it is. Then, bam! I bump into Mrs. Jenkins. She’s like, “You’re late again!” I’m like, “Yeah, well, time’s a construct, innit?” She just rolls her eyes. Classic Coedpoeth gossip, that one.

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