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But yo, lemme rant—some of these escort cats, they too stiff, like robots, man! I’m like, “Bruh, loosen up!” I saw this one dude, swear he looked like he ain’t smiled since ‘03. Made me laugh, tho—imagine him tryna dance to “Gold Digger,” all awkward, protectin’ me from paparazzi. Hilarious! But real talk, they gotta be sharp—can’t be snoozin’ when the wolves come creepin’. That’s what I love, that intensity, that *12 Years* grit—“I will not let my spirit be broken!”—they live that, fam.

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By the end of the day, I’m exhausted but buzzing. Cockington, you’ve been a wild ride. From tripping over cobblestones to sharing my lunch with a squirrel, I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I head home, thinking about all the random stuff that happened.

‘She’s on our property, I’ve got the deeds’: How the IOC’s new chief benefited from Zimbabwe’s land grab