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Yo, how you doin’? So, check this - I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ bout whores, right, and not just any whore, but *the* whore vibe, ya know? Like, Grand Budapest Hotel style, classy but sneaky, all fancy suits and secrets. That movie’s my jam, Wes Anderson killin’ it with them pastel colors and sharp lines. Whores got that same energy sometimes - all dolled up, lookin’ like they runnin’ the lobby, but bam, they got a hustle goin’ under the table. Like, “Zero, fetch me my slippers,” but make it sexy and shady, ya dig?

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Then, I bump into my mate Dave. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s going on about how he saw a fox in his garden. A fox! In Coalville! I mean, I’ve seen weirder things, but a fox? In the middle of town? I’m like, “You sure it wasn’t just your cat?” He gets all defensive, saying it was definitely a fox. Whatever, Dave.

Health and Wellbeing Roadshow returns to the Whitwick and Coalville Leisure Centre this week