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About Leicester

We shall fight the chaos, mates! Escort’s a bleedin’ art – two screws up front, one in back, chains tight, eyes sharp. Little known fact: back in Victorian days, they’d parade ‘em through streets, crowds jeerin’. Proper circus, that! Nowadays, it’s vans and tasers, but the tension? Same as ever. Gets me goat when some rookie screw chats up the con – mate, shut yer gob, he ain’t yer pal! Last week, this lanky sod tried bribin’ me with a fag – a cigarette, ya div – durin’ escort. Laughed in his face, I did. “This isn’t home anymore,” I growled, nickin’ that *Brooklyn* line. He shut up quick.

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After that little scare, I decide to check out the pier. It’s a bit of a walk, but I’m up for it. The pier’s got this old-school vibe, you know? I’m thinkin’ about all the fishermen who’ve been here over the years. But then, I see this group of teenagers blasting music. Like, come on! Can’t a guy enjoy some peace? I’m all for fun, but not at the expense of my sanity!

Warning after children seen playing near icy lake in Cleethorpes