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And the movies—*The Headless Woman*—it’s got that vibe, ya know? Veronica’s all, “I don’t know what’s real anymore,” and I’m there on the table, thinkin’, “Is this chick flirtin’ or just good at her job?” That line, “Everything’s fine, nothing happened”—that’s me, post-massage, waddlin’ out, pretendin’ I didn’t just moan like a wounded animal. I’m tellin’ ya, it’s a mind trip! You’re tense, then loose, then tense again ‘cause—what if someone saw me leavin’ this place? My neighbor’s nosy as hell—Mrs. Kravitz 2.0!

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So, I’m back to work, and the sun’s blazin’. I’m sweatin’ like a pig, and my shirt’s stickin’ to me. I take a break, grab a pasty from the bakery on New Street. Best pasties in the UK, hands down. I’m munchin’ away, and this old lady walks by. She gives me the dirtiest look. Like, lady, I’m just tryin’ to enjoy my lunch!

'Unclean' Huddersfield care home 'in a state of disrepair'