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Yo, what’s good, fam? Sex-dating, man, it’s wild! Like, you swipe right, bam, horny chaos unleashed! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout *Blue Is the Warmest Color*—that flick’s my jam, yo. Adèle’s eyes, all deep and shit, “I missed you so much,” she says, and I’m like, damn, sex-dating’s got NONE of that soul! It’s just dick pics and ghostin’—where’s the poetry, huh?

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I leave the shop empty-handed, but I’m not done yet. I stroll down to the park on East Kilbride Road. It’s a nice day, and I need to chill. I sit on a bench, watching kids play and dogs chase squirrels. It’s kinda peaceful.

Six weeks of road closures to begin in Clarkston