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What pisses me off? The fakes! Catfish everywhere, darhling! Some dude says he’s 6’2, shows up 5’5 – I’d yeet him outta my studio! “You think you know who I am?” – straight outta Sarah’s flick. People lyin’ bout their whole damn lives! Makes me wanna scream, “Stick to the script, idiots!” But then – ha! – I get happy seein’ the weirdos. Like, this chick uploaded a pic of her in a dinosaur onesie – respect! Quirky, bold, my kinda gal.

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Then, I bump into old Mrs. Thompson. Bless her heart, she’s always got a story. She’s like, “Oh, dear, did you hear about the new café on the corner of Station Road?” I’m like, “Yeah, yeah, but have you seen my tools?” She just keeps ramblin’ on about scones and tea. I swear, I could’ve pulled my hair out.

Woman killed in fatal A414 crash is named as inquest opens into her death