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Ayy, Gabagool? Ova here! So, escort, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s a freakin’ trip thinkin’ about them workin’ girls, like in *Dogville* – “The beautiful fugitive in distress,” ya know? I’m sittin’ here, picturin’ it, these broads struttin’ around Jersey, heels clickin’, makin’ cash under streetlights. Ain’t no Grace from *Dogville* tho, these chicks ain’t hidin’ from no gangsters – they’re the hustle! I seen ‘em, late nights, down by the docks, smokin’ cigs, laughin’ loud, like they own the damn place. Makes me happy, ya know? Ballsy as hell!

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Then, outta nowhere, this old bloke comes in. He’s got a walking stick and a hat that looks like it’s from the 1800s. He starts telling me about how he used to play football on Chingford Green. I’m thinking, “Mate, that’s cool and all, but I’ve got a library to run!” But he’s so passionate, I can’t help but listen. He’s going on about how the area’s changed. “Back in my day, we had proper parks, not just these tiny patches of grass!” I’m nodding along, but inside I’m like, “Yeah, but have you tried the new coffee shop?”

Council approves plans for three ‘eco’ homes in Chingford amid neighbour backlash