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About London

“Everything’s falling apart!”— aye, that’s the vibe when thou ghosts someone after a shag. Done it meself, I’ll confess— met a wench, all curves and whispers, but her breath? A dragon’s arse! Fled like a thief in the night, no text back. Made me mad as a poked bear— why can’t folk brush their teeth afore a romp? But then, joy— found a lass who cooked bacon post-coitus. Bacon! I’d wed her, but she swiped me off faster than a fly from mead.

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Then, I bump into an old friend from school. Can you believe it? We haven’t seen each other in ages! We’re catchin’ up, laughin’ about old times, and I’m feelin’ all nostalgic. But then, he mentions he’s movin’ to London. My heart sinks a bit. Like, why’s everyone leavin’ Cheshunt? It’s a great place!

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