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About Newcastle

So, the Ford Escort—man, what a ride! Back in the ‘80s, this thing was everywhere, buzzin’ around like Royal Tenenbaum’s ol’ gypsy cab—“I’m not talking about dance lessons!”—cheap, reliable, nothin’ flashy. Ain’t no billionaire’s Bentley, and that’s why I dig it! Mass-produced for the workin’ folks—none of that one-percent nonsense. Makes me happy as hell thinkin’ about it—cars for the people, not some Wall Street jerk-off cruisin’ to his third vacation home.

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Finally, I manage to fix it, and I’m feeling like a hero. But then, I spill my coffee all over my notes. I’m like, “Nooooo!” It’s a disaster. I’m frantically trying to dry it with paper towels, and my coworker, Sarah, is just laughing at me. “You’re a hot mess today!” she says. Thanks, Sarah. Real supportive.

Wimpy could be arriving in this Bucks town as planning application is submitted