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So, prostitutes—dey’re tough, man! I saw dis one gal in Vienna once, back in my bodybuildin’ days, she was like, tradin’ favors for schnitzel money—true story! Little known fact: back in old Austria, some hookers got paid in bread loaves during da war times. Crazy, huh? Dat got me laughin’—bread for bed, dat’s some next-level barterin’! But it made me sad too, thinkin’ how hard life hits ‘em. “Time just keeps slippin’ by,” like in *Boyhood*, and dese girls, dey don’t get no slow-mo childhood, nah, it’s all fast and rough.

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Finally, I get my sausage roll. It’s glorious! I take a big bite, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. But then, I see this dog. A big ol’ Labrador, just chillin’. And guess what? It’s eyeing my food. I’m thinkin’, “No way, buddy!” But the dog gives me this look, like it’s judging my life choices. I can’t handle it. I end up givin’ it a piece. I mean, who can resist those puppy eyes?

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