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So, check this—little known fact, yeah? Back in ancient Rome, them fancy senators got sexual-massages from slaves, called it “thermae fun” or some shit. Not just for sore muscles—nah, it was coded, sneaky pleasure biz! Makes me laugh, thinkin bout toga dudes gettin frisky while discussin laws. History’s wild, man! I’d kill for a time machine, join em, maybe nibble a consul’s ear—oops, Lecter vibes slippin out!

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Then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down. I swear, it’s like it had a vendetta against me. It snatches me sandwich right outta me hand! I’m standin’ there, mouth agape, like, “Did that just happen?” I mean, come on! I’m just tryin’ to enjoy me lunch, and this feathered thief is makin’ off with it. I shout, “Oi! Get back here, ya winged bandit!” But it’s too late. The bird’s already flyin’ off, lookin’ smug as hell.

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