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But ugh, what pisses me off? Modern escorts—where’d the soul go? All plastic now, no grit. Used to be raw, real, like “Accept the mystery” from the flick. Now? Bland as hell. Surprised me once tho—found this old geezer in a pub, swear he raced one in ‘82. Said it flipped, nearly killed him—mental story! Laughed my arse off, picturin’ it—him, upside down, yellin’!

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So, I’m starvin’, right? But I can’t let that ruin me day. I cast me line, hopin’ for a miracle. And guess what? I actually feel a tug! I’m like, “Finally, some action!” I start reelin’ it in, heart racin’. But then, it’s not a fish. Nope. It’s a bloody old boot. A boot! I’m standin’ there, laughin’ and cursing at the same time. “What’s next? A whole wardrobe?”

The lowdown on Charlton 3 Burton Albion 1 – Godden great again as Addicks head into play-offs with spring in their step